Is there something you want that you feel BAD about wanting? Do you have a roller-coaster relationship with something (or someone) in your life, and judge yourself for this? Well, my relationship with food and coffee has been like this for many years, until I had a breakthrough a few years ago after fasting for 33 days from both food and coffee. I discovered that just because I had had an unhealthy relationship with coffee in the past, didn’t mean that it couldn’t be something good and healthy in my life in the future.
If you haven’t already noticed, I’m an extreme and passionate person. And I’ve had a tendency to want to put things and people into black and white categories:
That’s good for me, that’s bad for me.
That’s right for me, that’s wrong for me. Etc. Etc.
But what I’m learning through my recent reunion with Vince (yes, that’s right, the news is out!), is that sometimes we simply need to hit a reset button, to fast, to have a break, to let something go. And then that thing (or person) can come back to us, in a healthy way, in a balanced place that wasn’t possible before the break.
A lot of my life I’ve been sabotaging my desires by my FEAR that they are bad for me. I spent so many years in the church learning that my desires were inherently bad, so I’ve spent a lot of time retraining my psyche in the truth that I can actually TRUST my desires, not fear them. The problem that occurs when we FEAR our desires, is that they become the thing we are afraid they might be. I was afraid coffee was bad for me, so I held onto it for dear life, until my relationship with it became very imbalanced. But once I finally let it go and realized all I needed was a reset, it became healthy for me. And now coffee is a great thing in my life. I love it and enjoy it and I don’t care what anyone else thinks about coffee, because I know for ME, it’s a good thing that enhances my life. It’s something I love and enjoy.
And you can use the analogy of my desire for coffee, for anything in your life that you desire, including a person. There was unhealthiness in my relationship with Vince. It was time for a big reset. And because we did that, we are now discovering each other in a whole new way. We are coming back together in fullness and life and passion, realizing that just because we had developed unhealthy patterns doesn’t mean we are “bad” for each other. On the contrary, now that we are in a new relationship with space and joy and freedom and wholeness, we are very GOOD for each other. We enhance each other’s lives. I’m better with him than without him.
So I challenge you today to think about your desires. Is there something you’ve been battling, and you think that if you let that thing go, that you will lose it forever? I encourage you, that by letting it go for a day or a season, you will be entrusting it to LIFE, to GOD, and that God always gives us the desires of our hearts. So if your desire continues to be strong for that thing you let go of, then it will surely come back to you and be better for you than ever. There is nothing to fear in letting go. There is everything to gain, and nothing to lose. In letting go of Vince, I have gained the most passionate, amazing relationship of my life. Because of the break-up, he has come alive. I am essentially with a new man. And yet, he is the best friend I’ve known and loved for 7 years. Sure, it was scary and painful to let him go. But I am more confident than ever to tell you: trust your heart, trust your desires. You may go through pain, but on the other side of the pain, is passion and love greater than you can imagine.
Watch today’s show for the amazing story of my reunion with Vince!